Things I have to learn part 1

I type this as I smoke my last cigarette. (Damn you Jon Bon Jovi for being so sexy and also I need to buy more cigarettes.) I always claimed to be a good listener but it turns out, I talk, way too much AND deaf from my left ear. Like WOW. I mean my friends (all of you) have to just put up with so much. I can't just SHUT UP! I wish I could though. I'm sorry, all of you.

I realized today that I talk way too much about this certain person I know. And my friends have to put with so much as I can't shut up about this person. So I have decided to talk a little lesser (and decrease my phone bill) and be nicer to all you people.

So now, everytime I dream OR have a thought OR think of something funny, I shall laugh all secretely to myself. I am done being an open book as obviously that didn't turn out quite well.

Why do people even like me? I mean, I'm insensitive, annoying, rude, pompous, narcisstic, perverted?, over-smart, MY music obsessed, obsessive and have no sense of responsibility. Those are not the qualities one likes very much. And I'm not even that cute. I just LOOK like a teddy bear; behaviour is not of the before mentioned.

And ironcially, I know of only 4 people who absoutely detest me. (Smart them, na?) Just stop talking to me, would ya? I need to learn how to shut up and listen.